Very Important News


Monday, October 01, 2007

Rumor Mill: Keanu's Not So Excellent Adventure

Report by Tyler "Ty" Deschanel

"Neutral looking" actor Keanu Reeves was accidentally locked in a wooden crate yesterday in a bizarre incident. The occurrence occurred in Beverley Hills, as the "blank faced" Matrix star was shopping. He was looking at some jeans when a group of teamsters picked up the actor and placed him in a wooden crate, they then hammered it shut and carted it away to the storage area. It took over three hours before staff released the mistake.

Keanu had this to tell us "Well it seemed those guys confused me with a mannequin and carted me off in a box! I guess it's not such a strange mistake to make. I didn’t really like being in the box but I am far too polite too make a fuss. Plus it was nice to be able to hang out without getting bothered!"

All I can say is Keanu Reeves' reputation for being the nicest man in Hollywood is surely undamaged!


Anonymous Anonymous said...

I was locked in a freezer once. By my wife...

Freddie Prinze Jr

2:04 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I long for the day when I will be as mannequin-esque as my idol Reeves.

Paul Walker

2:04 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Good luck to you Freddie and Paul! You are truly the heirs to my throne! Onwards and upwards brave sons!

Keanu "Circle K" Reeves

3:34 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

What about me?

Alex "Bill S Preston" Winters

3:35 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Chill Bill! I have a plane! I have spent the last week standing in a phone box! I'm sure Rufus is gonna get us soon! Be excellent to each other dudes!

Keanu "Big Kahuna" Reeves

3:36 AM  

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