Very Important News


Wednesday, May 09, 2007

The Buzz: The Stars Come Out To Congratulate VIN

Report by Mr Jones

The Very Important News Network threw two huge lavish parties last weekend in both New York City and Los Angeles to celebrate it's birthday. The events were the biggest bash of the year with the stars queuing up for hours to get in. I caught up with a few of the huge numbers of stars at the NY bash who battled to get in to this oh so exclusive occasion:

"Happy Birthday VIN, your exposing of my lack of talent has been very eye opening!"

Lindsay Lohan

"Wow one year old! You guys are almost as great as me Tom Cruise! No, not really I am the greatest!!"

Tom Cruise

"Wow you're one years old! Here's hoping my career lasts as long!"

Kevin "K-Fed" Federline


Steve Wonder

"Now that’s what I'm talking about! That’s how you have a party! From now on that's how you have a party! Wooo!"

Will Smith

"Diddy says Diddy Birthday to VIN! Diddy What?! Diddy Wow!"

P Diddy

"One year old? That's hot."

Paris Hilton


Nicole Ritchie

"Fancy a go? Only 20 bucks?"

Lee Tamahori

"Ha ha ha ha! Great news! Happy Birthday VIN A-ha ha ha ha"

Jackie Chan

"Happy Birthday Sugar T*ts!"

Mel Gibson

"Wassup Niggaz! Happy Birthday! PS I am available for Bar Mitzvahs."

Michael Richards

"Here's another great quote! A wise man once said "To be good you have to be true to yourself" and that wise man was me, Tom "Tommy" Cruise!"

Tom Cruise

"It's my birthday! I should be getting a birthday not them!"

Kanye West

"Happy Birthday! You do excellent work!"

Matthew Tsoi

"Watch me dance! Watch me dance! Ooh I'm on fire! The Cruise Machine is burning it up!"

Tom Cruise

"Happy Birthday to all your sexy writers!"

Jessica Alba

"Oh Mr Jones you are so hot. Happy Birthday!"

Adriana Lima

"Many happy returns! I love the site!"

Sumit Dutta

"Happy Birthday! I love you! You always support me even during my "crazy" days!"

Britney Spears

"It's your Birthday? Don be stupid, stupid!"


"Hizzle Bizzledizzle!"

Snoop Dogg

"Listen to me carefully..... Happy Birthday.... that is all"

Wentworth Miller

"Ooh Wentworth!!! Happy Birthday VINNY darling!"

Elton John

"Happy Birthday! What!"


"Can't talk! I'm still on the run! Happy Birthday!"

Wesley Snipes

"If I had a birthday, here's how I would do it!"

OJ Simpson

"Happy Birthday old chums!"

Tony Blair

"Happy Birthday! You are not girly men as opposed to all the other web sites! And trust me... I will be back! Get it?"

Arnie Schwarzenegger

".... (snort snort) Happy.... (snort) Birthday!""

Kate Moss

"Hear me growl the words to Happy Birthday! Grrrrwlllll!!"

Vin Diesel

"Heh heh heh heh Happy Birthday!"

George W Bush

"I have to go home now and be with my kids! Thanks for inviting me, Tom aka "Tom Mack Daddy Sex Machine Cruise Missile" Cruise! Happy Birthday VIN!"

Tom Cruise


Anonymous Anonymous said...

What about me? I said that VIN was as good as my career. My career is golden isn't it?

Ben Affleck

5:23 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You missed out my quote too you idiots!

I said "VIN was mad like me!"

Michael Madsen

5:26 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Affleck you suck!!!

M Damon

8:36 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have to ask Michael, in Kill Bill 2 are you supposed to be playing a woman or a man?

8:37 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I was in Kill Bill??

Michael Madsen

11:51 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You guys are the best... I love you... I want your babies!

Boy George

5:16 AM  

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